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For years of being in prison I’ve had to constantly be on guard to survive behind these walls. Being in a place with so many predators I can’t show weakness because if I do I will be eaten alive. So I maintain an aura of “Don’t f**k with me man!!” masculinity that is growing tiresome.
I’d love to show others that there is more to me than these devilish good looks and a mean right hook. I like to listen to Country music, read fantasy books (shout out to R.A. Salvator), and most of all I like to help people. But, IF you were here you wouldn’t see this part of me.
You wouldn’t see that the next woman that I want to be with will be my wife, and that I long to see my Mother smile in person and not just on a picture.
What you would see is an emotionless shell of a person who by means is looking for problems but will not back away from them either.
I’m just a man who is waiting to go back to his cell where I can breath again and let down his guard. I cannot wait until I can stop feeding that other wolf.
What do you show to others? Is it really you or is it who you need people to think you are? Who are you? Do you wear a mask like I do and why?
Hector Hernandez #01339187
Count Ya Blessin’s
Don’t be soo negative/pessimistic! Truly you can steady complain about what we don’t have that you wish you did. I mean how hard is it to realize that we can only do so much and you continue to beat yourself up, cuz you wish you had a better job, a nicer car, a bigger house, better looks or for some a better girl/boy friend.
Sometimes we just need someone to come along and shake us so hard that we have to get hurt in the process. Sometimes it talks some old fashioned tough love to open your eyes a little to see the silver lining.
The majority of people try to make everyone around them happy, even though they’re not happy themselves. Look, instead of whining about something you can’t totally control, how about making small strides trying to be grateful for the things that you do have.
Try looking for the good in every bad situation or better yet, start counting your blessings and I guarantee you the people around you that you associate with will see the difference and they too will slowly adopt the same optimism.
You might be one out of a thousand who say, “Well, I don’t have anything good about me that I can put my finger on”. Well, I’m sorry to say that, everybody in this world we live in has a blessing that they’re grateful for, you just have to look deep.
Keith Costa #1149298
Gratitude is the key to happiness! It seems borderline absurd that life could be reduced to such a simple notion. The search for one’s happiness seems elusive, if possible at all. Even when one reaches their goal, satisfaction is fleeting. With that crossed off their list, one will immediately focus on their next hurdle.
This advice is not pouring out from a wise individual. Frankly, I’m the opposite. Through the gutters and failures I’ve turned inward and learned this universal truth. Instead of constantly worrying about what you do not have, have gratitude for all that you do have. Be thankful.
Sure, many can say it sounds corny, but is being happy corny?
Gratitude could be, “I’m glad to only get 13 ½ years of prison instead of life”. “I’m grateful the cops didn’t shoot me while I fought to pull my firearm”. “I’m grateful to have my family in my life”. I could go on and on but I don’t want to appear corny.
Seeking happiness from others or from possessions is temporary. Therefore, when it leaves you, you’ll be unhappy. Why seek happiness from anywhere outside of yourself? You don’t need anyone or anything to be happy.
You are perfect as you are, flaws and all. Be secure in who you are and know that other’s opinions of you are reflections of how they see themselves. It’s in actuality not about you at all.
Have gratitude for your very existence.
Aaron Busbee #01994886
Thank you for your time. The purpose of this blog is to put a little more info out there on the person you see. I’m very open and honest and love reading, working out and anything educational. I’m trying to come out a completely different person. I have 2 boys who need their daddy and can’t wait to put a smile on their faces. Right now I’m determined through studying health, fitness, religion. If you have any ideas for me, please let me know.
I’m looking for employment and a new start. Willing to relocate and one thing about me, I’m a hard worker, determined to change lives and help others in any way I can. I’ve been in Administration Segregation so I have lots of time to reflect on my past. I refuse to let it slow me down, but it’s always good to take time and remember what got me here so I don’t repeat it.
I love to laugh, make others laugh and create healthy ways to deal with negative setbacks. I take full responsibility for my actions so I’m not a guy that believes I was done wrong. I’m just ready to get out and start a new life. Maybe something special will come my way. In the meantime my focus is recovery and taking any and all certified courses I can take via mail. I’d love your help on reading supplies or info on college courses and employment opportunities. Hit me up about anything??
As a grown, my understanding has elevated to a height where I realize the value of women. Congratulations to all women who’ve managed to rise above their struggles. Finally a light shines on women’s rights for freedom, justice and equality. It’s absurd how some men treat women.
There is no life without the female principle. Women are our other half, our balance, our first teacher, and mother of civilization. In fact, in the animal kingdom, it is the lioness who teaches her cubs the art of survival. Without her there is no “king of the jungle”. In fact it was women who helped man enter in the ‘Race to Space”. My point is, women are a vital piece. I’m eager to see more women show and prove they can work as good as men or better.
Unfortunately, there are many women who don’t subscribe to feminist perspective. Now the issue isn’t what’s happening, but more of how can we lessen it. I encourage you all to acquire “knowledge of self, respect yourself, be better than yesterday, and teach the next man, woman, and child the value of your being. Until then, remain the strongest species. # Women’s rights.
Anthony Yates #01653668
By: Anthony Yates
Sitting alone reading “The Voice of Martyr’s” magazine, I come face-to-face with a story of this Christian gospel singer in Eritrea, who was captured and imprisoned for her faith in Jesus. Being physically violated by prison guards, hoping the torture would make her renounce her faith; her faith only grew stronger which eventually led to being released paralyzed from the waist down.
“Why are you worrying about this”? Because I read story after story of faithful Christian women suffering the attacks of the same crime for which I’m serving time, I couldn’t resist this cardiac arrest. The tears flowed, my heart hurt and my mind raced. I began praying for my persecuted siblings and asking God to let me use my past to help people, whatever I have to sacrifice to accomplish this; I AM MORE THAN WILLING as well as accepting what comes my way.
All the light being shined into the dark of prominent people’s closets, I feel a deep urge to do something productive that will contribute to preventing as much sexually based offenses as possible. I’m open to any ideas or projects you may have. Whatever it is that’s on your mind, I am all ears.
Please keep in mind that I can not change my past, but I can determine the course of my future and my sights are set.
Please include your return address if you contact me through JPAY.
- I asked for strength and God gave me difficulties to make me strong.
- I asked for wisdom…..and God gave me problems to solve.
- I asked for prosperity….and God gave me brawn and brawn to work.
- I asked for courage….and God gave me danger to overcome.
- I asked for love….and God gave me troubled people to help.
- I asked for favors….and God gave me opportunities.
I received nothing I wanted….
I received everything I needed!!!
I’m a vivid dreamer when I sleep at night. Occasionally, I dream of dogs I used to own. We had a lot in common. Usually we ate out of bowls, loved getting our backs scratched, and liked to play anytime, anywhere. Always happy… Wagging our tales.
Protective of our families and territories. Never said “No” to a treat. Don’t like vacuum cleaners and sometimes we drool. I love my critters. I’m just a little jealous of them, too. If I could be reincarnated, I would like to come back as a chocolate Labrador, but not a homeless one. Instead, an uptown Fifth Avenue dog, pampered, groomed, and fed… a lot.
My critters always missed me when I was gone. Not one time did they not jump into my arms when I opened the door. They never questioned where I’ve been, who I was with, or what I was doing. Trusting and loyal. Always.
I can’t say that about ex-wives or girlfriends. And I can prove it about most women today. All you have to do is lock your partner and your dog in the trunk of your car and an hour later open the trunk and you’ll see who is happy to see you.
I know they are animals, but who are we to judge them? They aren’t opinionated. No politics. A simple pecking order is in place and they remain peaceful creatures. That is, until we train them otherwise. Maybe that’s the one and only reason they remain man’s best friend.
Maurice Pledger #R03597
Thanks for checking out my blog. Took some years into incarceration to not be ashamed to run across people I know and hear how did this happen. To most that wouldn’t phase but me it would. Now in addition to making new friends I hope to unite with old ones. If anyone remembers me from Calumet High School on 81st and May in 1993 winter or Crane High School 1994 Spring and last Marshall High School 1994 Winter. From there I went to Dayton, Ohio to attend Dayton Job Corps in ’95-’96. Came back to Chicago, worked various jobs; Popeye’s, 95 King Drive in ’96, Gas City, 87th, California in ’96 right after getting off from another I began. Then Sears in Ford City Mall ’96. By ’97 UPS Hodgkins, Illinois early ’97 to mid. By Fall of ’97 worked at O’Hare and that was my last job. Years ago I learned my aunt attended a family reunion and met a good friend again she knew from work. In conversation they both learned they were at their family reunion and then found out they were 1st cousins. I too wonder who I met if anyone was actually family that’s amazing I think.
I’ve been hoping to meet long lost family for a while and the way things are in life time can be short unexpectedly. The world is big but as people meet many times learning we know a person, we say it’s a small world. T.T.Y.L. :)
The New Me
Hey Friends! I'm currently studying to obtain my real estate license after my release. It's challenging but I enjoy every part of it; learning new things and having motivation to keep my mind focused on my goals even while being incarcerated. Does anyone know what test i need take in order to be licensed to do real estate in any state? Message or write me at the address provided...I would so appreciate it. I'm also willing to relocate.
A little update about me...'ve been working out, studying, and getting ready to come home this year. Going through this experience gives me the desire to do things I've never done before or things I was afraid to do. Like going sky diving, dying my hair all blond to complement my caramel skin, wearing red lipstick, despite the fact I think my lips are to curvy for it, things of that sort I'll do now... lol...
I'm interested in friends who are limitless like myself, therefore we can blossom on many levels. Some things are meant to be unleashed!!!
I have a sense of humor. I like to be myself when I'm around my friends and I'm comfortable with who I am, inside and out. I'm understanding, humble, and relentless. I love to put on clothes and feel sexy. I like having intellectual conversations. I always have the curiosity to learn more than what I knew yesterday. I like to be around people where we can make each others day much better.
'Ill be here for a few more months so I hope to spark a connection with some awesome friends...talk to me...I love to talk back...