My former pen pal and I are somewhat in contact now after my exploding on him for all of the bull in his letters to me. He does call but I've not been in his company and from what I have been finding out from him I don't want to. It just really upsets me that he is back to dealing heroin and cocaine. He assured me through his letters that he was going to fly straight when he was released. I'm so upset also because I know that its just a matter of time before he ends up right back in the prison system. It sickens me to think of how many people he is destroying out there even killing. He is selling a killing substance he is no different from a murderer in my book. I saw what heroin does to people. My bestfriend almost lost her life to it. She did anything for it. She was rapped and beaten on so many occasions. Right about now he makes me sick. He doesn't care what he is doing to people or the lives he is effecting. I can't believe I even cared for someone like this. I can't believe that I had so much faith in this man...so much love. He has a beautiful well off family that would give him the world. I just don't understand. Thanks for letting me vent.
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Tracy, I am sorry you are having this happen. Please remember though, it isn't easy for these guys when they get released, and sometimes the only people who will accept them and not make them feel like they are worthless pond scum are those people they hung around with prior to their offense.
I'm not condoning what he is doing by any means, but don't just hate him, feel sorry for him and pray for him (if you're religious) he needs help not hatred.
Summied, believe me and please may I make this correction: I don't hate him, I hate no one. What he is doing is making me sick. My stomach turns from the sound of heroin because of my personal experience of seeing someone I loved dearly slowly dying and almost loosing her life. I've also seen many others just waste away from the deadly poison. Young girls sell thier bodies for it and loose their precious beauty. I've seen young men just a mess from it, hustling on the streets. It just hits close to home.
Hi Tray and Sum,
Sum you are right , thats why its a revolving door for most.
Tray what he is doing is wrong but at the same time,,, like people here like to rant and rave about,,,drug users have choices too.
Be glad he is dealing away from you Hunnie
Babs
I think we all need to remember that just locking someone up does not mean that they will somehow be changed automatically and leave prison as new people.
It is, I think, very easy when one is sitting in prison to tell us, or anyone, I am never doing anything to come back to this hell hole. Easy to say when you are in it.
But when you get to the street...have nowhere to live...nothing to eat...no job to get...it is so easy to go back to the old ways no matter how sincere you were on the inside of the fence and wire.
And please understand ...I am not talking about the person described in this thread....just talking in general.
At the end of the day it seems to me that it is not entirely about this person selling drugs again....but as much as the betrayal and pain that those close to him must now bear as the price for their love, encouragement and respect.
Just my thoughts
Tom
Thank you for telling us about all of this and I know that you are hurting , and I will pary for you and for him. But it is his choise to go back to this, and as long as he is doing that , I would stay away. We can only do so much it up to them to do things differnet and not end up back in prison again.
Tracy it is a difficult situation.
I know you're angry at him for getting back into drug dealing and yeah they can and do kill people. But we're never gonna get all the dealers off the streets. If you lose one dealer you quickly find another trust me. It really isn't that hard to do.
He probably had every intention of staying straight but the world isn't that forgiving. And when you need to do, you do what you know.
It is a great shame that he's doing the same thing again.
It's not quite fair to compare drug dealers to murderers but I do take your point. You do make a decision at the beginning with drugs. But the dealers become as addicted to the income as the users do the drugs. Everyone become's a victim.
I don't know what to suggest.. I really don't... all I can do is hope that things improve for the pair of you.
Thank you
hi tracy,
i think everyone here has a excellent point about this post.by no means do i condon his actions.i have heard from ohter people that when you are released from prison it is extremely hard to find employement,i think that it is easier for some to make the fast buck.look at it from this point,why try to get a minium wage job when you can get some dope and make bank roll in a few hours?that is the hard part for some work your butt off for a few dollars or kick it on the street's with the homies and make hundred's.
it is truely sad that it's like that for some.sorry this happened to you and i wish you well.
I am opposed to the use of dangerous drugs such as Meth, Heroin and cocaine. The worst aspects are the crime and depravity that people go through to buy them. I have my own rather traditional values, but don't want to regulate others. I know where drug houses are in our barrio, but don't say anything so long as they leave me, and mine alone.
Anyway the police to a great extent appear indifferent. Only one time I saw people shooting up behind my property, and became angry and called,to my great surprise, a cop came to the scene in what seemed like seconds and arrested them by himself.
John