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Petminister

I've read that women prisoners get an average of ten times the mail that men do. I'm wondering, do they really appreciate the mail like the men do? Does it become like trying to pick something out of a candy store? Any of you who have female PPs might enlighten me.


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KateAndrews

I look at my penpals like big brothers. I don't write to female prisoners, however, like you only write to encourage and provide companionship.
I just wished to say I'm pleased that you found the experience worthwhile and wish you both happiness in your future.

 
knorton2019

Thought that I would comment here even though this thread is kinda old. I have been and do write a woman that is incarated in Ohio. We have been writing and talking on the phone for almost a year now. Met her through this site (kudos on the site, by the way!). We are now in the planning stage for her release later this year and are planning to create a life together once she is out.

My comment on women really liking to get mail, I would say a qualified yes. Some are out to land a sugar daddy while some are looking for friendship. It is just like it is for guy in prison. I know from experience being an ex-offender with ten years of time behind bars. I think both men and women grave a connection with someone. It is part of our make up. I had plenty of guys in prison ask me to craft love letters to their pen pals. A lot of them were just scamming the women that wrote them. But some were real and wanted to build a relationship. You get good and bad whether the person is a man or a woman.

For me when I first started writing Kayla, I had no intention of falling in love. My reason was to incourage and make her time a little more pleasant. But after four months we were falling for each other. The one thing that was plain when we were first started corresponding is that she did not want money and such from me. Even now she is reluctant to ask for anything.

 

 
Penbeach

silver...... I will tell her and just see, does age or length of sentence, or things you just let me know. I will send her a letter in the morning. Let me know .......whatever. She tells me there are alot of women in there who would love to get a letter , just once in while.
Paul

 
silverparrot

Penbeach, tell your girl that if she knows of a womnan thats wants a friend I will write her!

 
Penbeach

Jessica, glad that you did write to women in these prisons, you did to that and I would like for you keep doing that , as my PP tells me, "there is a lot of girls in here that get no letters". So Iam glad that you do that. hope that turns into something that is long term.

 
Canadiangirl2976

I wrote to two females recently...one stopped writing to me after my second letter and other one really seems to be happy having me as her pen pal! Said she doesn't get much mail and is VERY appreciative that I've reached out to her as a friend. So for those of you who really want a female pal, don't give up! I'm sure there are other females out there who would be happy to have other female friends!
Jessica

 
Penbeach

yes most of add that women put out there ,
" men Only" yes there are ones that looking for sugar daddy, but I have to think most are looking for some one to love them and understand .

 
midwesterngirl

"Cashed up men?" Hmmmm...that might be my preference too. LOL!!!!

 
Penbeach

silver , you did try and that is all that you can do, she may have wait a while , for someone to write for a long time. But you did the right thing by sending that letter.

 
Squirell

my fem pp stopped writing after a couple of letters.....so although they do want and appreciate letters, it would appear cashed up men are there preference

 
silverparrot

I wrote a female also and she wrote Thanks but no thanks she was looking for male friendship?? I thought damn..

 
Penbeach

TCF, yes you are right, women , even if they are tall and thin and all the rest or just nice if they have long sentence, they dont get a lot of mail , and what they do get alot of that is trash mail. Or if they do write it doesnt last all that long.

 
TCF

I think generally speaking that women don't get as much mail as many believe. Unfortunately Pen is correct with a lot of what he says and his Pal tells him.

If you look on sites that single out women who have not been sent letters you will, on average, find the following; over 40 years old; overweight; long term sentences; not physically good looking. It is sad but that is what it appears like to me.

There is one site that I stumbled across a while ago that has photos of female inmates naked accompanying their ads. I doubt very much that any of them are the inmates themselves...although some may well be...but the ones I saw looked an awful lot like models to me. Undoubtedly the photos are designed to attaract as many men as possible.

I have been writing my Pal for about two years. She was posted on three sites for a year before I started to write her. She did not get a lot of mail, and of the mail she did get only a handful were worth responding to. Those she did respond to wrote for up to a year, then just disappeared.

With regards to writing to same sex Pen Pals it wouldn't surprise me that in most cases you would find women inmates looking for men Pen Pals and men inmates looking for female Pen Pals. But whether they are male or female they all want the same thing, whether they admit it or not, and that is to have someone in the world who does not judge and condemn them and so they have someone "waiting for them" when they get out.

Just my thoughts

Tom

 
Trena

I personally wrote to 3 females and two didn't write me back and one stated thank you but she was looking for a sugar daddy to take care of her. I would also like to find a female pp but when I sent some letters out that is what I received in return.

 
midwesterngirl

I've considered a female pp too but the majority of their ads are clear that they want to correspond with men.

 
Penbeach

Mon, when I talk to my PP and will get her name and address and well we can just see. OK.

 
Momof5

I personally would love a female pp so if any of yours have friends that want a female pp, please tell me! I have written to 10-15 women and only one wanted friendship from another woman. :(

 
Penbeach

My PP tells me there is a very pertty women in there for intoxification manslaughter, and her 1 st parole date is 3-2010 , and she knows that there is no way that she will get out. Her max sentence is 09-2017, she think that she will be out in about 2012 or 2013 . But even with an add and a very nice picture of her , she get very little mail, she get alot of trash mail that just goes in the trash. My pp tell me that she is tall and very nice, but had too much to drink that day. She would be called a long termer.

 
Petminister

Thanks, Penbeach. That really helps a lot. I had forgotten about the tendency of a lot of guys to get graphic in their letters.

 
Xray48

My gut feeling is that the only ones that don't like getting mail are the dead ones.
Sure, the women, in prison, can be scammers and players, just like in a male institution. But they are still human and getting a friendly letter has got to be a great pick-me-up for anyone. Of course that doesn't mean that they enjoy getting mail from everyone that writes. Along with more mail, I would bet that they hear from more weirdos, too. My PP tells me that she gets some that go straight into the trash, and she washes her hands immediately!

 
Penbeach

MY PP is in BCI here in Fl and she tells me " there are a lot of girls that never get letters", as i her about the ones that have adds, she told me as first you would get a lot and after weeks weeks it just falls off to nothing, them you get the letter that is nothing but dirt, sex this and sex that. She has told me that most , just want a nice guy who will write and wait for them to get out. She has told me " There are longer termers , in there that are good looking girls that once the adds are 2 or 3 months old , the letters just go to nothing" or you get letters from guys that they would never want to be with. She has told me that after the women get to know you they want love letters not sex letters, I am sure that we all know the differance. She has told me that in BCI there are some 700 women in there and some just dont get mail , on a regular bases, for some it is very big deal. She tell me a long termer is someone with over 7 years, and over 10 years well they get few if any letters. Ok that is just one places .