Do you ever wonder if you might be writing to the same penpal as someone else here on the site? I tried to pick inmates that didn't have anyone writing to them yet but I'm not sure when their profiles get moved. Not that it matters but I was just curious.
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I was going to post this question yesterday actually! I have totally wondered that.. My pp has some other pen pals from this site and they could be on the forum!
No, because my pals didn't have ads on WAP.
None of our business. Inmates can have as many penpals as they choose.
probably they do i think that is a good thing it would be awesome if every inmate had at least one person to write to,
Yep i am just soooo nosey lol. But no i don't care its cool that my pen pals write others.
It can definitely happen. I found out that 2/3 people on here write to one of my guys, They know I know. We're all cool about it :)
If I had a pen pal I know I would want others to write to them, I would feel to mouch pursue if I was the only one
I don't think that someone from here is writing to one or more of my pp's, but I definately wouldn't mind at all. If it makes my pals happy, it makes me happy, as long as they have enough time to write me:D
My PP does write to others, I encourage it. However, I would get a bit funny if he wrote to one of the regulars on WAP. Once my PP said he got a letter from a woman in Holland... this was on the phone, and I almost started to wheeze (I thought QB). But then he went on to say it was a 40 year old married woman with five kids...and somehow I just knew it wasn't QB.. :P
It secretly is!
[QUOTE=drinkwater;1047606]My PP does write to others, I encourage it. However, I would get a bit funny if he wrote to one of the regulars on WAP. Once my PP said he got a letter from a woman in Holland... this was on the phone, and I almost started to wheeze (I thought QB). [B]But then he went on to say it was a 40 year old married woman with five kids...and somehow I just knew it wasn't QB.. :P[/B][/QUOTE]
YA THINK?! lol. :rollinglaugh:
Shhhhhhhhhhhhh! :rollinglaugh:
Why would it matter?
Because, I wouldn't want to know what kind of people he was interacting with. Although I don't know anyone on here that well, I get a gist of their personality..so it would be strange to know that my PP was talking to, and building a relationship with someone that I might speak to on here.
I'd be totally cool with it.
I think as much contact as my penpals want and can have with others is a good thing, so the more penpals, the merrier. And if that contact was with anbother member who participates here on the WAP forum, then I'd be all like " Wow! Yah, isn't he awesome!"
I dont know...my PP could have any PP from all over the world...why pick another WAPster?
lol if my PP was writing someone else on here I would be cool with it,but I would feel bad for R if he was because I write so much and he tries his very hardest to write the same amount if pages as I sent in my last mail to him. The page numbers are quickly increasing lol:laugh:
How would he know the person who wrote to him was a WAPster, unless they told him so?
It's not like he can come online to this forum and say, "Oh hey, that Earthmother/ QB/ Karleep person sounds like fun...I think I'll write to her."
If he got another penpal and it just so happened that they were a member of this forum, it would be nothing more than random chance.
In a way I get what DW is saying. I have no problem with my guys writing to other people, as Earthmother said.. "the more, the merrier". I did/do however have this thing where I'd rather not know WHO it is. BUT, should it happen that I find out (which has been the case with the 2/3 other WAP-ers on here), then I'm cool with it. I remember the very first time it happened, I was like "OMG OMG OMG.. HER?!".. But not in a "OMG THAT BEYOTCH" kinda way. More in a "OH WOW, I HAD NO IDEA!" kinda way. lol. If that makes sense. hahaha. One of my guys writes to 2 other WAP-ers and they know I also write to him. I'm cool with it, even though I KNOW who it is.
I hpe that made sense :p
I agree with the sentiment 'the more the merrier' I encourage my pp to write people, especial locals so that he can keep in touch with the developments of his home town/area. Also, I encourage him to write women who are different to me (more suited to his personality), its just odd if it was a wAPster...and yes, i know it would be by chance.
Same for me!
I don't care very much about that. If I would find out that someone I "know" here has the same guy as me, I'd think it's funny because of this happenstance, no more no less.
Altough my beloved Mister California told me that I'm the only one and "he wouldn't know why he should wish for any more"....awww.
I don't care if my pps write other people but I really don't want to know who it is. Just seems like it could get awkward if I did. I've also been very clear with each of my pals that I won't tell them anything about my other pp. I just feel more comfortable this way.
This really is not going to be popular but......I wouldnt like it at all. I know how personal letters could get and what we write to each other so really I wouldnt want that to happen with someone else regardless of where in the world they are.
Hes the same with me and other penpals thats why I only write to him and vice versa. it works that way for us, we have had this conversation before and its all cool.
Aww! :-) thats so sweet!
Actually since my PP is kind of "high profile" I just remembered I know some of his PPs (thanks to websites dedicated to him, etc). Mostly young females too :p But I have no problem with that. Maybe I just wouldn't like one of my best friend to write to him, because it would be weird, and they could talk about me, etc. But people I hardly know... who cares?
I don't care who mine write to or how many I just prefer not to know them.
I don't think R writes to anyone who posts here. He's told me about who he writes to and none of them seem to be anyone who posts here. I know no one "new" here is writing to him unless they found an old ad of his somewhere on an unknown website because his ad isn't up on WAP anymore.
But if he were writing to someone else that posted here I don't think I would mind. Well, lets just say I wouldn't mind depending on who it is. :p
Although neither one of us made an issue of asking each other if we were writing other people, when D's profile on here was due to expire it did come up because i offered to renew it and he did not want me to. He wanted it down. Likewise, at that stage he told me he would be more comfortable if i was not writing other people. There was no drama or emotional manipulation over it; just a mutual decision to only write each other from that point on that we are both happy with.
No doubt though it does happen that 'who is writing whom and how many' becomes an issue but hopefully in those instances, all parties realise they have the power of choice and do not have to put up with emotional manipulation, possessiveness or anything else silly like that.
I think two of my pp's asked if I had any luck writing to other people which is why I asked the question. At the time I wrote back that not everyone had replied but I got a letter from the 3rd person I wrote to yesterday. I was honest and simply said I initiated 3 letters and planned on writing to all 3 if I got responses back. It wouldn't bother me if they were writing to other people. After all, they are in prison and if writing letters helps them through this then I'm all for it. That is why I decided in the first place to write myself. If I thought someone here was writing to one of my pp's I probably wouldn't let on that I knew or suspected. It's not my place to approve or disapprove of someone writing to another person. Everyone has the right to choose what they do. That being said, IF I was in a relationship with another person and I found out that they had that same type of relationship with another pp, I would be upset. At that point I would then have to look at the situation and judge it for what it was.
:acry2:
Uh, funny this thread should come up. My pp just told me to contact another one of his pen pals on his behalf (she stopped writing him, but he needs her help). I'm not pleased, so I take that back. I dont want to know any of my PPs other pen pals...WAPster or not.
I can see why some people would perfer not to know. I mean in these letters you share personal things about yourself and it creates a great bond between each other that sometimes to imagine they have that with other penpals potentially could bum some people out.. Everyone likes to feel special :)
You told him no, right? :p
Take my advice. Never get in touch with any other pen pals. It only caused unnecessary drama.
have you done that before mox? Im pretty sure it would cause drama...His ex has just been in touch with me...wait until you hear this...il let you know soon ok.
ughh...where were you when I was googling this woman, and sending a message through a fake FB account (because I dont have one myself). Oh Moxie, she is so pretty! and a vegetarian! An animal rights activist! :acry2:
omg an ex... this is why I dont have a FB page. Horrifying things happen.
When I told my brother I was writing to a prisoner he said 'COOL I wanna write to someone too!' and I thought 'oh god imagine if he writes to one of my pp's...' Luckily after a while he forgot about it but how weird would it be if we were writing to the same pp?I don't wanna think about it!
I wouldn't wanna know who they are writing too and I wouldn't want them to have like 10 pp's...I guess 3-4 would be ok :)
Oh, this sounds good!
I was busy playing the new Angry Birds. :rollinglaugh:
1st PP's girlfriend and I were in touch but not constantly. We would swap the occasional emails but never discussed PP except for when she would tell me that she went visit or whatever. I wish we were still in touch because I wonder about her a lot but we're not, so that's that.
I stumbled into contact with 2 of R's PPs somewhat unwillingly. There's one lady he asked me to mail something to, which was no problem. Then the other PP... Ugh. Long story short, R had a disciplinary issue that was going to make his visits with one PP become null and void, I contacted other PP so he could let her know. That caused drama. Then this particular PP was trying to swoop in and take my scheduled visit time with R and that just pissed me off. Even met the guy when I was up there earlier in the month but he acted like a snob. :p so I told R next time he wants a message to get to someone else he better write it in a letter because I'm not calling or emailing anyone anymore (except his mom - we're cool :p ).
So nooooooooo. No contact with other PP people! I thought it would be harmless given that R's two PPs are "mature," in age and in mentality, but nope! One now thinks I'm a groupie and the other thinks I'm a liar. Whatever.
What ever [I]she [/I]is doesn't define who you are, remember that! I would chalk up the message you sent her as a mistake and leave it at that. I might also ask my penpal not to ask me to do that again. It's really not fair to you.
Yeah, for me it's not that I need so much to feel special (cuz I'm not) but more like I don't want to be involved with other people that way. I've been asked a few times by pp's to be on their relative's fb or get in touch with this and that person and I always kindly say no, it's nothing personal, I just don't do fb and don't get into it like that. I'm there for the letters and in one case, the phone calls, and that's between me and that person and that's it. My mind compartmentalizes it, I guess.
Seeing as one of my pp's already had fb drama with a relative and someone who writes him, I'm soooooooooooo not interested.
Sounds kinda like why I'm not interested in going there with people!!! Sorry that happened to you, though...
I think that anybody who has a "pen pal" and they don't want to know who else they are writing, really has designs of being more than pen pals. JMO.
If you're just friends and you want him to have friends then it wouldn't matter WHO it is. But when you're secretly hoping that this is going to be more, (and I mean secretly b/c you haven't really admitted it to yourself yet) then the pen pal writing anybody is irritating and even more so when you know one of the WHOS. You'd sit there like, "He finds HER amusing? What on earth do they have in common?"
Some people will say that it's because they're afraid that the pen pal will spill their secrets to others and I say BS. They just don't want to share. Pure and simple. And I'm not saying there is anything wrong with that. But come out and say it for what it is and don't say, "I'm OK if he writes other people," because the reality is, you're not.
:rollinglaugh: at least you had a valid reason.
Ah drama! And I remember the old guy story...lol, even at an advanced age, some people cannot share!
as fee said you guys won't like this but..... while most claim to not care if or who their pp writes, at the same time they post parts of letters, even describe the stationary the man uses to a T...so to speak....SMDH!. that in it's self is a form of ownership, a way to "mark" and advertise the pp as yours. there are many ways to tell about how great the pp is or how much he/she likes your letters with out bragging on WHO your writing to. well, that is unless your his woman, then that right IS yours.
Totally off topic, but I do like your butterflies Melanie :)
I have been here for ages yet I still cant multi quote...god!
I think I must disagree on that. Sure I like it when I receive their letters with compliments. But that does NOT mean that I'm in love with one of them nor that one of them is "my" man. And yeah, I've shared fragments of letters and pictures they've sent me. However I wouldn't have any problems whatsoever if someone of you guys would write to one or more of my pp's
i wasn't implying you or any one that post that stuff is in love...i'm saying and rightfuly so that members should stop posting actual paragraphs and other things that can postitively identify him or her. i'm not going to continue to break things down for people when, i've already broke it down to the simplest terms i can think AND do it in a nice way. well hell...maybe i will after all.a penpal is ONLY a friend, the inmates WOMAN is his EVERYTHING she is the one he wants. and he damned sure don't want some possessive female penpals posting parts of letters, or other things to hurt and upset his woman. this goes for the men who write women inmates but i don't think men are as catty as women. you guys can get upset i really do not care. A. or "T" depending on if you call him by his first initial or the initial of his nickname has told me, and i've been told by my other pp's that women pp's on some sites have caused this trouble before. i've seen enough to know they are right. now i think that's pretty clear...i'm set to see my rep. things plunge to non existance but this was something that needed to be said. one last thing that stationary i mentioned in another post was handmade/homemade with something very specific to A. there is no way in hell it was from any one but him. on re-reading the post i replyed here, it seems some of you guys can not grasp the fact that NOT ALL women on here are JUST penpals. there are lots that have husbands and boyfriends in prison. the reason i'm upset well...not so much now, but the reason was that this man was MY BOYFRIEND WE WERE TALKING ABOUT MARRIAGE....
No i do not wonder i KNOW....LOL..... :)
Me neither.
Let not your heart be troubled.