Hi!
If you ever had the case that one of your penpals did not write back in the usual amount of time, how long did you wait until you sent another letter asking if everything is okay/if they got your letter/etc.?
While i've got one penpal where I never worry too much about when I hear from him because his mail always takes very different amount of times, I got another one that always wrote me back in 20 days or less. Now I haven't heard from him in almost 2 months and I'm not too worried because I know that things were fine in the last letter and if something bothers him he would tell me instead of disappearing, I'm just wondering when I should send another letter asking if everything is okay. I know you need a ton of patience (and I'm used to waiting very long times from other PPs where it always takes much longer for a response) and I heard a lot from other people that sometimes their letter somehow didn't get there or their penpal couldn't write back for some reason (lockdowns etc.), it has just never happened to me before, so I don't know how long I should wait before sending something again?
Thanks!
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I've got no exact rule on that one, I go by my gut feeling on that onre. When I get a feeling sth.might not be ok, I'm gonna ask in a friendly and gentle way. And that really goes by rhythm. Different rhythms with different ppl, just like you said.
Thanks so much :) I will now wait until it's 2 full months, then write another letter
Well I think the usual advice about being patient and not making the assumption that communications to/from prison work on the same time frame as regular mail, apply only insofar as it's a new and unfamiliar situation with a new pen pal. Once you've been writing to each other and discover your own "rhythms" as writers, and the quirks of your own mail rules at that facility, you have more room to judge whether something is off-kilter or significantly different from the usual pattern. If you've been writing tor several months and have an idea of how often you expect to hear back from one inmate, then I'd say you can just go with your gut. Send a letter asking if everything is okay, or if they got your letter...if it feels like it's been too long to you, I don't think you have to hesitate to send another letter to ask. Especially if you feel like writing another letter anyway. Just avoid making it sound like an accusation, or a complaint. If it's just a friendly note to say Hi, that's always a nice thing to receive.