A lot of the people who have been doing it for awhile have some really good advice on here, so maybe you can help me with this one before I sit down later this week to write fresh reply letters -
Sometimes my pen pals discuss their case, and tell me (not in wild detail, but they do give me step by step of what happened) about their actions. They also do explain how they’ve become better people since then, how they’ve learned to avoid making serious mistakes. So I tend to focus on encouraging those things, the education, good works for the community, family, healthy hobbies, etc. because that seems to be more important and I can at least be a good friend to them in that department.
I have no clue what to say about the actual crime they were formerly involved in (and they were violent crimes, so not sure if that makes a difference?) when they tell me about it. So I don’t end up saying anything and just talk about the other stuff instead. I’m not even always sure how to feel, because crime in general seems so confusing and foreign to me. I just don’t get it. I’ve tried reading about it and there are so many theories out there on why people do what they do.
It’s kind of ironic, because they love it when I talk about my life, and tell them if I’m stressed at work, or have anything I’m trying to figure out, because they love being open to giving me advice. One joked he’d love being my therapist, he finds my life fascinating. But I would have no clue how to play that role back when it comes to certain issues.
Do other people’s pen pals talk about their case and former crime? Do you have any words of wisdom you give to them?