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I feel like so Often we read about people being scammed or people warnings others to cautious about there pen pals/ partners, but what about the fairy tales endings ? Does anyone have any happy stories to share?
I don't necessarily have a "happy ending" to share, because our story isn't over, but I'm thrilled to talk about my penpal experience.
The person I have been corresponding with is absolutely a wonderful person. He's never asked nor accepted money or gifts, pays for phone calls (he finally asked to call me after 4 months - yay!!), and is so uplifting in our conversations!
He recently sent me his favorite book (beautiful wrapped, I might add), and asks me so many important questions of life. He's never openly flirted or hit on me, but his consistency and actions have proven to me how much he values our friendship (and the subtleties in his courting have been oh, so sweet.)
He adds to my life. He celebrates my quirks, is my biggest cheerleader, and after 7 months, I admit, I'm most certainly swooning. He only calls on Sundays. We never say "are you going to call?" Or "will you call me?" He just knows that's my free time, and he remains consistent. It's refreshing and honest. No matter what happens (I'm taking it to my grave that I'm smitten, haha), I'm so grateful for our friendship. I know I met a good one.
I just submitted my visitation form, and in May I hope to meet him in person! I can't wait -- fingers crossed!
Trust yourself, Kiara! Let good things come to you! I know you deserve them. :)
Sorry for the double send!
beautifully* wrapped, oops!
Well, I told y’all about the day of epic awesomeness here a while back - meeting my pen pal of four years for the very first time. On his release day. Words still can’t even describe it, but I’ll try to expand on it below.
So, maybe you know how these pen pal things go, or at least this is how it went for me. You write back and forth kind of tentatively at first, then pretty soon you’re stalking the mailman. After that, you’re looking forward to phone calls, and then sending in those visitor forms. Well, our foray into the visitor thing crashed and burned, twice, for reasons still unknown (though the feds are kinda tough; they prefer that you know someone prior to their incarceration, which we did not). Time passes and we continue writing like madmen. Sometimes photos arrive in the mail, each one stoic and stern, not at all befitting this stranger who became my friend, who became my brother, and who’s the bringer of so much joy.
Getting ready for release day was full-blown panic on his end and preparation on mine. I asked what he needed and got it, and then met him at the bus station. He had a cross-country road trip ahead of him and I was the only one at the front end to meet him. Folks, it was epic beyond all description. Meeting my friend on the most momentous of days – and seeing his smile for the very first time. It never left his face for the whole nine hours we were together. (I got a ticket for myself the first leg of the trip) (What? Ya think I was just gonna do a twenty-minute hello and bon voyage???) Hugs? We squeezed the air out of each other!
Beyond the joy of just being together, there was something that practically moved me to tears. But, we’re guys, and guys don’t do that, or certainly not in public. The bus stopped at every medium-sized hamlet along the way and we got out every now and then to stretch our legs… and we’d walk to the front door of the bus station… and often there’d be women behind us… and my friend held the door for every last one of them… something he hadn’t been able to do for well over a decade… because in that world, the doors were always locked.
It was so simple yet so profound. I watched my friend transform from a prisoner to a gentleman before my eyes, but the truth is, he’d always been a gentleman. The only thing missing was his freedom, and now it was his to claim.
He's doing great, by the way...
I met my wife in prison. She stood by me at my lowest and we are still married with 2 kids. But she always made it clear to me that just cause she met me inside she wasn't willing to put up with me going in and out. It's so cool to see people you did time with out there doing good. I think some people who have a loved one inside or pen pals do have a shit time and like to project that on others so y'all worry and think there are groups of women out there after your friendships or men. Just cause it's happening to one person don't mean it's happening to y'all . Part of having a happy ending is not buying into others insecurities and just listen to yourself. If you have a good feeling stick with it if you don't leave, people who take time out to write someone inside create more happy endings then negative ones. So thank y'all for even trying means a lot.
I don't have an ending because I'm still writing after a year but I love doing so!! Sure there were a couple misfires on either side and I got some negative feedback over being a pen pal at times but truly good people just want others to succeed so I would listen and take that advice to heart, and I found my way. It's great, being a pen pal. I found a healthy balance with it and just try to do the best I can. I hope that down the line I'll have some even better stories and more wisdom to share. Enjoy!
It's not an ending per se, but better , a new chapter. Mike and I have decided we'll get married in the summer. We've been engaged for a few years, we had planned to marry last year, but then we decided to wait, due to prison hassles, he moved pods, money, his parents not being able to travel - a bunch of reasons - but this year is it..
My pen-pal that I found on this site, became my husband. I wasn't looking to meet, let alone marry anyone. In fact, I even put off writing to him initially because I found myself daydreaming about him, before I even said hello. I also work in the CJ field, so this is considered taboo. One more thing, he's a lifer with no possibility for parole.
I'd like to say that our love, and our relationship was a slow courtship, but about a month in he proposed, I said "no", he asked again, and I said "yes". I stopped thinking about all the "what if's" and what people had to say. I also started living life in the present and focusing more on the moment, because being a prison wife doesn't allow you to plan in the future.
I can tell you I am living my happily ever after each and every day.
My story isn't over yet, far from it, but I met the love of my life through this site. I was looking into going back to school to be a prison counselor. I thought I'd write to an inmate and see how well I could interact with them and help them. I spent about three hours looking at profiles before deciding on an inmate to write to. I don't know what made me choose him but I now believe that it was fate or something like that. From the very beginning, he surprised me with his honesty and openness. I was skeptical as hell at first -- what are the chances that I write to one inmate and he turns out to be the guy I've been searching for all my life? Nothing he did raised any red flags but I would still stay awake at night, convinced there was no way this could be real. Before long, he did some things to prove his sincerity. I was not looking for love or expecting a romance at all, but that's what it became. We fell in love and we are both happier than ever. We are hoping to get interstate parole when he gets out next year so he can move here with me. I believe he is 'the one' for me, and he feels the same about me. He is just the most genuine, honest, sweetest man I've ever met. We have a long road ahead of us and yes, I'm aware that anything can happen. But I believe we have the tools needed to make it last.
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