Hey all,
I currently have 2 penpals, and have been writing to them for only a few months.
I am in the UK, both are in the US, one in Colorado and one in Texas.
The Texas inmate and I have been exchanging quite long messages back and forth in an "ordered" way, if that makes sense. A letter usually takes 8 days from him to me, then I respond within a day or 2 via jpay. With the Colorado guy it's been a bit more confusing as the postal delay has been longer for whatever reason, so we have overlapping letters.
However, I know that this holiday period is going to screw up post majorly. I know it's way past the date where post UK-US and vice versa will get through before Christmas, so even though it's past the time I would expect a reply from either, I know it's the postal system, and I know that I'm not likely to get anything this week or probably for a while after Christmas too.
But just because I'm not receiving snailmail, I'm very much aware that they are sitting in prison having (probably) sent a letter and awaiting a reply.
... question is, is it "too forward" to send an extra message (jpay) to them both this week, or maybe again later over the Christmas period?
Knowing that any letters *out* are going to be delayed, is anyone else just saying "sod it" and sending an extra one this week so they have something?
(I'm not too bothered with the Co guy, as our letters have been all over the place with sometimes sending or receiving 3 in a row etc, just forwarding pictures from me or him wanting to write to pass time), but I didn't want it to come across as too pushy with the Tx guy as our letters have been much more regular)
Thoughts?
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I personally don't think you can ever mail them too much - considering their situations. BUT, if they're anything of any real substance, keep in mind wires may get crossed. I'd sent 3 4-5 page letters in response to a 16 page one my IL pal sent me at the end of November, and because I've sent them at different times over the last 2 weeks, his most recent letter was confused and disappointed (long story). But if they're just little "thinking of you" letters, it should be fine.
Good point, ans I would be sure to start with something like, just thinking of you, you don't need to reply, I don't have your mail yet, this is just an extra message because I know post across the Atlantic is going to be slow, etc.
I just don't know if letters become irritating, especially if it's around a time like Christmas when they should be with their families :-/
I obviously cannot speak for anyone in prison, as I've never been, but I hear what you're saying. I too worry about overkill with mailing. Mine has always commented that my extra letter or my cards have caught him by surprise, but he's also said he was going to wait to combine the letters to keep things organized.
If I were you, I'd send away. I'm sure it will boost their spirits :)
Hehe, that's kinda why I'm not worried about the guy in Colorado, as he's done exactly that. He wrote me a letter saying "I know you probably haven't even received my first one and that I might look like some creepy letter-stalker, but I thought I'd write another..." So yea, I'm happy with sending him stuff just randomly and I know he appreciates it. I just wasn't sure with the PP where so far all of our letters have been back and forth with no in-between letters :-/ Plus he has a girlfriend (also via penpal) so I don't want to sound like I'm overbearing...
I think I might send one just before Christmas? Or just after :) Glad someone else has the same thoughts I do!!
I ask myself the same question.
I did write a second letter to one of my penpals who has a bit of an attitude problem that gets him into trouble. But after I sent it, I kind of regretted it, because I don't want to be overbearing/patronising ; but then again, knowing someone cares and takes the time to write you a letter to give you advice can be positive too... Plus, there are quite a few things I'd like to tell my other penpal (who hasn't responded yet) and writing multiple short letters instead of a really long one after he replies may be better.
Like IL_PPP says, one can never write too much. I guess I'll probably tell my penpals that they may be receiving an extra letter every now and then and see what they prefer.
Thanks, that's helpful. I guess it's that it's Christmas so I know international mail will screw up our usual back-and-forth, and I don't want them to go without mail over Christmas just because their letter didn't get delivered here :-/
As I've mentioned before, my main PP and I are on a loop of multiple letters and we don't worry about length, we just respond to each one individually as we receive it and it works great for us! But I have also written others who don't necessarily like or want multiple letters in circulation, it differs depending on the individual.
But, since you're asking about extra mail around Christmastime, I say absolutely go ahead... the prisoners will welcome it, they are already away from their families, so any correspondence from friends, family, anyone positive is welcomed and appreciated, the holidays are a difficult time of year for inmates for that reason, being out of society and away from loved ones, so I try to make sure my pals get extra stuff in the month of December in particular, you should be fine, especially if it's just JPay stuff you're doing for extra! As I've said in other threads recently, writing extra is not a bad thing... it shows them you're thinking about them, you are including them as a part of your life and you care about them, all good things so send away!
Jpay is there for what it is... I know in Texas they print them out and then the inmates have to reply by letter... but they still get there... and if you want to write them before Christmas... Now seems as good a time as any.