I really can't,reasons:
1)Age,there aren't many ladies around my age in there,I'm 23 so...should I try a find someone older say around 30?
2)Type of crime,for some reason I don't have a problem writing to someone that has commited a murder but can't write to someone that has commited kidnapping or armed robbery...Does that sound strange?
3)Same interests,I guess you can't know exactly what their interests are from their profile alone but still,I don't wanna go into it blind and then make them loose their time and money for nothing if there is nothing there...should I just go in blind and see what comes up?
I'm currently writing to only one pp but I think another one or two would be great...Any advice apreciated
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Age it all depends what you are comfortable with and would you have things in common with a 30yr old lady?
Nope not strange..everyone has their limits and reasons for writing or not writing to inmates with certain crimes. Maybe it would be better for you to go in blind and see what comes up.
Good luck hope you find someone.
I'm not a person who believes I have to be the same age as someone to have something in common or a friendship with them. What does it matter so much if you are just writing? You're not trying to start a family, ha ha!! I have friends from every spectrum of the age groups.
As far as the interests thing goes, well... I think that most of my pp's and me come from pretty different backgrounds. They may not be all that interested in dance or my music or my writing but they can still be interested in those things or their own music and hobbies and talk about that. When the differences are TOO much, I agree, that gets hard, but I don't think you truly have to like all the same things, in fact, that might be kind of hard to come by. To be able to talk about hobbies, yours, theirs, etc, that's what makes a good letter, I think. They don't have to read the same books but they read their own kind of books maybe.
The pp I am closest too had the least likely ad "for me" out of all of them so...go figure. I didn't even think he'd ever write me back and now here we are 3 years later, happy to have found each other. I'd say try some more intro letters and see what happens. I find that trust doesn't come right away and it may take a few letters to really warm up.
As Gooddog says, how important is age? Unless you're looking for a romantic relationship, you may connect with somebody who's a little older. If you don't feel comfortable writing people who have committed certain types of crimes, you shouldn't do that. Just look for ads where you feel like you may be able to find some common ground with the person and write them. Good luck on finding more pen pals!
No I'm not looking for a romantic relationship (never say never but it's not my goal),I'm from Greece so a relationship would not be that realistic,I know some ladies in here have done it and I'm happy for them but I just don't think I could do it.
Fee the real question is would someone be interested in having a younger pen pal say 5-10 years?I really don't mind how old they are as long as they are open minded.
To be honest, I think it's like this: If an inmate doesn't name [U]exactly[/U] what age the penpal should have I would assume that it's not bad to be 5-10 younger/older than the inmate. Especially if there is no romance wanted (by the inmate).
[QUOTE=Franconia;1047070]To be honest, I think it's like this: If an inmate doesn't name [U]exactly[/U] what age the penpal should have I would assume that it's not bad to be 5-10 younger/older than the inmate. Especially if there is no romance wanted (by the inmate).[/QUOTE]
I'm thinking the same yeah,but I don't think there are many ladies in there that don't want a little bit of romance with whoever they are writing to,like a bit of flirting.I wouldn't say no to some flirting either cause in my opinion it's quiet normal for two people of the opposite sex even if they are not really sexually attracted to each other.
So, if you don't mind the possible flirting, just give it a try? Look for girls who don't specifically search for relationships and write them, then you will see if there will be flirting or not - but as you wouldn't say NO to that either there won't be a problem in my opinion!
Good luck!
Noooo age is not an issue for me at all,I was afraid it could be an issue for them.Eight years older huh?Ok I'm sold!Thirty year old ladies here I come lol!
Nah... they'd be happy to get your letter!!! I'm sure of it.
My most fun, most rewarding letters and emails are with a guy almost exactly 35 years younger than me. We share the same interests, like the same sorts of things, and we both detest Lady GaGa.
[CENTER]:gagme::gagme:[/CENTER]
There is no possibility we will ever meet in person, but Crikey! its entertaining!
Unless they put in it in there profile I think age is irreverent. My closets friend is 66, my best friend is 17, and I am 31. I think if anything they would be happy to show off their new young pp, and it would make them feel more hip.
As far as crime you have to what your comfortable with, but I know I hope no one would judge me in the present what I did in the past, and prevent us from having a future.
:roflmao:
:roflmao:
Your closet has a 66-year-old friend? Mate, I thought you were out of the closet! ........ :lol:
But don't we all kind of go into this a little blind? At least I know I did. My PP's ad did list some of his interests, but it was very vague to say the least. I wrote to him anyway and we hit it off perfectly.
I am, my closet isn't, its awkward when we go to bars, also my credenza doesn't wash its hands after it pees
Geez, Silas. Do you go around and correct everyone's posts? :p
Don't worry, Josh. Silas just had a post where he tried to say his "Englisg" was "batter" than mine. :)
If you have some common interests or see something that sparks your interest when you read a profile, age shouldn't matter. So opening that up a little bit should help you find someone to write. I work with whatever broad interest they put down, and ask a ton of questions to get in there. I think the going in a little blind is part of what makes it fun. :)
Touche.
I only correct people's posts if I like the poster.
(I went to the same school as the Prince of Wales, so I have some excuse for my eccentricities.)
We wouldn't want you any other way either.
Your credenza must be popular at leather-and-denim parties! :lol:
If correcting spelling is your thing, I'll keep you very busy, if you correct my grammar you may never have a free moment ever again.
Correction is hardly "my thing". It is my duty.
(As the Bishop said to the the choirboys.)
Who needs free moments?
That's true,we can never be 100% sure about what we are gonna face.I'll just take my chances with someone my age that doesn't seem to have the same interests as me and with someone older that we have common interests.
My penpals range in age from 25 up to 50, and I've found enough common ground with all of them to carry on interesting correspondence. I'm 41.
Hmmm? As I read through several of the responding posts, there is one important aspect that I think has been overlooked. Perhaps you just don't have the right motivation, or inspiration, to write to an inmate, MakisKaras. I think that there really aren't that many people who write to prisoners, so it wouldn't be unusual for someone to say that they don't enjoy it: which, sounds like the case, for you. If you really can't find someone who peaks your interest, then maybe you should look somewhere else to fullfill a desire to be helpfull to someone. You have to be honest with yourself, as well as with whomever you might write to. Just a thought.
I am also thinking that if it doesn't feel right, to you, then it would be unfair to start writing to an inmate, and then drop them, because you didn't find them, or the project, interesting. Being isolated from the outside world, it is much harder for them to find a friend, and create a relationship, than for us, so they put themselves out, with an ad, in hopes of finding someone. Too many false starts are going to break their hearts and make them lose all hope.
Xray48, I think you are being a little harsh, perhaps even judgemental here.
MakisKaras has shown that he is unusually empathetic - for a man of his age and situation - by the fact that he has already put his hand out to incarcerated people, and by the timbre of his many posts on this forum. He has made it clear that he is not looking for romance, so your epigram: "Too many false starts are going to break their hearts and make them lose all hope." holds no water at all in his situation.
Perhaps you should cease hiding behind the erroneous quotes in your signature?
You probably haven't seen my other posts on this forum so I can't blame you for having that opinion/thought about me.I'm one of those that really believe writing an imprisoned pp is one of the most 'simple' rewarding things that someone can do.I'm currently writing to 1 pp for about 4 months now and don't intent to stop for a long time.I'm choosing to be so picky to avoid exactly what you said 'have them put themselves out and then break their heart'.If I didn't care about that I would be sending letters to any and everyone because for example they were just hot,but I hate the thought of that,it's just not me.So,I have trouble finding someone not because I'm not 100% sure I want to but because I don't wanna see someone get hurt due to my lack of judgement.
[QUOTE=JoshA;1047102]As far as crime you have to what your comfortable with, but I know [B]I hope no one would judge me in the present what I did in the past, and prevent us from having a future.[/B][/QUOTE]
I LOVE this!!! And I love your siggy.
It would seem that we have some super sensitive people here. The man said that he was having trouble finding the "Right" PP, listed some reasons and then asked for advice.
Having read all of that, and several of the responding posts, I simply offered a different aspect on the situation. Now, I am harsh, judgemental, and have, perhaps, voiced a low opinion??? I think that you guys need to get real. I wasn't being critical. I just think that we have two guys who need to get on with their life. It's like you don't have enough, else, to do without stirring up crap on WAP. If you can't take someone elses opinion/viewpoint, then perhaps a public forum is not the place to be. Now, I do have a low opinion. Nuf said.
You said it, honey.
Any crap that has been stirred has been stirred by you.
Having opinions and viewpoints, offerring advice are all fine, but making a personal attack is definitely [U]not[/U] fine. Public forum or no, at least try to live up to your signature:
Live simply, love generously, care deeply,[B] speak kindly[/B].
I wrote to four women aged 30 to 35 I hope they all write back,I'm soooo excited and I just can't hide it baby!
Awesome, hopefully your replies st quick :)
yay!!! inform us when u hear something :)
I hope you hear something soon.
The first wait is always the worst if you ask me!!
I hope you get your replies sooooon MakisKaras!:)
I will!That 'first letter' gives me the goosebumps everytime,imagine what 4 first letters will do hahah
I agree but that makes it be even more exciting when you finally get the letter!
Maybe try just looking at the persons pic. and ask yourself if you seen that person in public is it someone you would like to meet and talk to? After all you wouldnt know them until you introduced yourself. I think you'll be happy you did. go for it!!